Russian Roulette
by Midnight's Shining Star
Summary: The whole world was just a game, and they were but players - not even, pawns more like, desperately clawing at one another for a hopeless gain. Oneshot. Slightly drabble-y. Pre-Ishvalan war through episode 24 of FMAB. T for dark-ish themes. Slight Royai if you tilt your head upside down and squint really really hard.


**A/N: Uhm, I'm writing again. No, it's probably not what anyone who's still following me is looking for. Sorry guys. I'll continue my other stuff someday...**

**So I just got really inspired to write this after re-watching some FMAB and also while watching some documentaries for my Political Science class. I feel like the POV I wrote in is a little odd...but maybe it fits. I dunno. ****Please ignore the crappiness of the writing. It was just kinda...thrown...together...**

**I don't own FMAB but I do own the story, including the poem-like thing. **

**Characters: Roy Mustang, Riza Hawkeye  
Genre: Drama, Suspense  
Rating: T for adult-ish/dark themes  
Word Count: 1,154  
Time: Pre-Ishvalan war through episode 24 of FMAB. Slightly AU  
Prompt(s): Behind-the-scenes politics  
Summary: The whole world was just a game, and they were but players - not even, pawns more like, desperately clawing at one another for a hopeless gain. **

* * *

_**Russian Roulette**_

* * *

_Why have you come?  
__Are you here to play?  
__Know that once you start  
__You must stay_

"I'm leaving"

Short. Simple. Two small words. He cleared his throat.

"I'm leaving" he repeated, slightly louder. As if she hadn't heard him the first time.

"I know" was her reply. Short. Simple. Two small words.

He nodded and turned to leave. She watched him walk, so many thoughts running through her head.

_Who cares? _

…

_Be safe… Come back soon. Don't forget me. _

_._

_.._

…

_Please don't die. _

…

They welcomed him as if they had expected him all along, as if they had known he would join them one day. And they congratulated him, but something wasn't right. Beyond their cheery grins and promises of a better future, beyond the shining gates, he knew – their mirthless laughter told it all.

_Come, you're already here  
Don't leave now  
The music's only begun  
Take a chance  
Dance with fate  
Remember your choice brought you here_

He stepped into the room; all eyes seemed to be watching him. Politics. Why was it always politics? What a nasty business, lying, cheating, thievery at its finest, and all quite legal. Deception, undermining, control, power, yet all necessary to play the game, a game that so few are chosen for and even fewer leave intact.

Of course it was by choice. It was all by choice. And yet, when it came down to it, what other choice did he have? Besides, how much more harm could it possibly do? He was well enough damned already and even though he knew it could get worse, it couldn't possibly be too much worse. He knew how to play with fire.

"We're so glad you could join us" they smiled, soullessly.

"Really, the pleasure's all mine"

_Watch now as the game begins  
Your turn comes soon enough  
Remember we play for keeps  
There is no going back  
The gun is on the table_

Honestly, he had expected a certain amount of corruption – he didn't expect what was to come. He heard the whispers in the hall.

_What a tragedy_

_Who could have known such a thing would happen?_

_Such a terrible accident_

Accident? What blind fools they all were, believing whatever they were told, like a good little flock of sheep. How could they not see the obvious truth? How could they take the lies without a second thought? But then, it was not like he would say anything either. After all, there were consequences.

_I heard the General passed away too_

_Yes, a heart attack apparently_

_How unfortunate_

Ha, as if. Even he knew it was an assassination, a bloody reminder to all who overstepped the bounds. And yet it wasn't the first either. If you did something you didn't like you suddenly found yourself involved in some sort of "accident." Yet there was so much more. He really was only just beginning to learn how the game worked.

_It's your turn now so take your chance  
If you're lucky you'll make it  
But nobody escapes completely clean  
The longer you stay the longer you play  
The harder it is to leave_

All the secrets, all the corruption, all the lies, all the destruction – he needed to tell someone. But who was there left? Who could he trust? He'd dug the trench too deep. There was no one he could go to who wouldn't betray him. Worse yet, if the upper echelon found out anyone involved could die, not just him. He'd been lucky enough to survive this long, he couldn't very well ruin all the work he'd done. And yet, the deceit and treachery was slowly driving him insane. How many lies had he told? How many dreadful deeds had he done? How many people had suffered, all in the name of justice and peace? As he soon discovered, it wasn't over yet.

_Why? Why is she here? What could she possibly be thinking?_

"Hello sir"

He returned with a curt nod.

She produced a small white envelope.

"I have a message for you"

Of course. That's how they start everyone. Before you know it, that hill you were working at becomes an impassible mountain, all the while you're buried deep inside.

"Thank you"

She turned to leave. He should warn her.

"You should watch the stairs on your way out. They're steep; we've had others take nasty falls."

She stiffened ever so imperceptibly; knowing that he wasn't talking about the flight of steps leading to her superior's office.

"Have you fallen?"

"Not yet"

"I believe I'll be quite alright sir. Thank you for your concern"

She left, closing the door softly behind her.

_If only she knew…_

_So you're lucky enough?  
One last round  
Do you dare to take another chance?  
The odds are perfectly even  
Come and dance with death once more  
After all, you've no other choice left_

Years passed of course, each day more surprising than the last. How were they expected to live like this? It could be any moment, someone could give the order and they'd be gone. Or he could give out altogether too. But for years he had played this game, and he played it rather well. Even still, there was much he did not know, much he needed to find out. How many others would have to be dragged into this? It wasn't fair, but it was fate.

"If something happens to me, I want you to get out of here"

"I refuse"

He stopped short and turned to face her.

"That's an order"

_This is not the time _

"I cannot comply"

"You're quite the stubborn one"

"You should know that by now"

He stared at her for a brief moment. Well, why not? She knew the risks, and by now he was a master of the game.

"Fine. I'll definitely come back so wait for me here"

"Yes sir! Good luck!"

_Ah yes, luck. We should be needing plenty of that._

He was a master of the game, so he thought. Even so, anyone who plays with fire is bound to get burned. He should know. Even the most careful can't escape the inevitable.

This, the room, the people staring, all reminiscent of that day years ago. How could anyone know it would come to this? Yet, he had somehow known all along, something was bound to happen. No one could play forever. This time, shots were fired. This time he'd gone too far. This time there was no certainty of tomorrow. There never had been, everything was just a lie. Just a game of chance, and this time, he pulled the trigger just a tad too early.

_Of course you had to know  
No one wins this game  
It's only chance  
Play it long enough  
You start to believe you're invincible  
It's only chance  
Sooner or later you're reminded  
But by then the blood is on the wall  
_

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**A/N: Please leave a review with your thoughts :)**

**~Ja ne**


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